Where is the real me? What do I want?

[Bridgestone]

Hi purple..
just checking in with my long lost twin today

A question about you both 'owning' the house.. does he still pay the mortgage? If he does, then I would just consider asking him, out of respect for your privacy, to let you know a bit ahead of time if he needs something out of the house. You aren't trying to keep him from his house, just want a measure of respect for your privacy as you are willing to do for him.

If he does not make payments on the house, then I would be a bit more direct.. ask the above and if he refuses to comply then I would tell him you will be changing the locks.

I had a 4 digit combination lock installed at my new place, because my D was notorious for showing her Dad where the extra key was kept, no matter where I would move it too.

And yes there were nights I was fearful of his temper enough to worry about him using that spare key to come into my house. I never told D this which is why I'm sure she kept telling him where it was at!

Each kid and I, & my parents have a 4 digit number that is theirs alone. On days that I knew my H was going to be in my House with D or S, I left it unlocked so there was no reason for them to enter their code. as far as I know H still does not know either of the kids codes to get into the house.

Why I suggest this is that you can program these locks to have a code and then easily 'erase' it. So if you knew he was coming over tomorrow you could program it tonight with his number and then 'erase' it tomorrow night, so it was only 'good' when you put it in! Make sense?

Just a thought.

I like your ideas about the birthday gifts. Xmas was hard here. I got him 12 gift cards for a wine/chocolate shoppe that he & I frequented before the S. I give him one a month, sent in a 'friendship' card. my own version of 'wine of the month' club.

Nice benefit is he usually shares the purchase with me
Hope you have a great day!



Hope your day has been good!