So you already know the answer really, although it's probably not the one that you want. I think no contact at the moment is the way. You did the right thing in sending the email and making the gesture. She hasn't returned it and anything you do now will be seen as pursuing. I know it is counterintuitive but you saw from my sitch that leaving them alone to get on with it frees them up to contact you.
I really honestly don't think that she was using you to help move. That is quite a vindictive thing to do and I haven't got the impression from what you have said about your wife that she is that way. It sounds like she is taking some time out from the situation and adjusting.
I think it is true that you wouldn't expect friend to act that way, and you wouldn't accept that behaviour from a friend. Under normal circumstances it isn't right that your email should be ignored. But we are not talking about a friend here; these are people in our lives to which we allow great liberties to be taken with us. I think TwinDad gave a very good reason for this once which is, would you rather be right or happy? These alien spouses are very confused people and it is hard to imagine any instance where they would conform to the normal rules of courtesy. It isn't right, but it is reality and they are confused. I don't have any answers I'm afraid except to DB but I think that because they aren't following the normal rules we can't either and berating them for their behaviour doesn't work in the long run. In my experience it only makes it more likely that they will repeat it.
Remember, just because you aren't doing anything doesn't mean your not divorce busting. Having patience is very hard - you know that I struggle immensely with that and I completely understand how you’re feeling.
