Okay, I see that now, thanks. What I have to confess to is that OM was coaching me every step of the way. I would talk to him every day. We'd go over what had happened the night before, & what my goal was long term. Everytime I even talked about quitting or giving up, OM would remind me how strong I am, & if that didn't make me try again, he'd tell me to be ready to kiss my kids goodbye every other weekend. OM said a lot of good things, but he also messed up my head in a way he never could have predicted.
As far as your wife not telling you what you're doing right or wrong.....did you ever read where Forrest told me to make a graph. Then when I'd do something, chart if it made H move closer, or farther away. If you write down the behavior with the response, pretty soon you'll know. Or.....you could tell me what you're doing, & I can tell you if it's right or wrong.
This OM of yours was a strange one. Why he was coaching you on how to deal with you H is interesting. But it does take someone of the oposite sex to help us understand how to deal with them.
Men are straight forward. Tell us point blank what you want and not just once but several times till we get it. Women are more subtle, you have to go round and round and round until you finally get to the point. Its hard for you to be straight forward and just as hard for us to dance around the issue.
Thats why you have so many men asking you questions beacause most women will not tell us what we need to hear. They tell us what they think we want to hear and then we get it all wrong. And if we talk to other guys it does not get us any closer to understanding women.
Have a great 4th and keep posting. You are helping so many of us relate to our W.
