OK This one is for Baggy...but also, this IS my sex blog and therefore, I want to share a little bit. Whee!
On Silly's other thread, Baggy made a guess that I wouldn't necessarily be up for his "Taken in Hand" type of relationship. (I did go check out that website a little bit Baggy...very cool).
For those who don't know, the gist of it is this: strong women want an even stronger man. One who can literally *take us* physically and sexually.
This can be difficult for the average man because he normally doesn't have any training in how to do this. It can also be difficult for the average woman too, because she knows she secretly wants it, but it is not something she can teach her man.
Here's my confession and experience with this...
I was one of the typical women who wanted it but didn't know how to show a man what to give me. Enter my now-fiance into the picture. Lucky for me, he already knew how. He has been there and done that. He is naturally an alpha-male and really "gets" women and what they want and need, and he spent most of his life single and got to play and experience just about every typical male fantasy there is. All the while, women threw themselves at him and begged him to fulfill their fantasies as well.
On the other hand, I had been very sheltered (by some standards) in real life, but very active in my mind sexually and in my fantasies. So my mind wanted one thing, but my body had no clue how to go about getting it, nor what to do when I got there.
As it turns out, we are a perfect match in so many ways...because even though he had been a bad boy in his past, he needed and wanted a good girl to really be with and settle down with. I am certainly by *experience* a good girl...but in my mind I yearned for so much more sexual freedom.
Our sex life at first was very charged, beautiful, expressive, loving, warm...but not naughty. It took me some time to shake off the shackles of my long sexless marriage and my inexperience.
But I'd say within 6 months, I was busting out of my shell.
Now I'm just a love machine, and I don't work for nobody but him.
:0)
At this point, we are over the top. None of my friends or anything I read anywhere have the type of sex life we have. Due to his experience, we have such a great head start. But I brought some things to the table that *most* women don't...so as it turns out, it is actually me plus him that causes our great sex. Not just him and his skills.
One of the things I bring to the table is that I am a gymnast. Which means, I am incredibly strong, incredibly flexible, and I can move smoothly and effortlessly. He is also very strong and I am light weight compared to him.
So this combination of our skills allows us to have what I call "circus sex".
Yes, it is probably what you are thinking. Impossible positions can be achieved by a gymnast and a strong man. Yes I can do the splits while he is going down on me or pounding my lights out. Yes he can literally throw me across a room, and yes I can literally roll and walk out of it as if by magic. Also being a dancer (ballroom, swing, etc) there is so much to learn about lead and follow that can be used in the bedroom. (I encourage every couple to learn to dance a lead/follow style of dancing for this very reason).
Another thing I brought to the table is the fact that I am extremely physically tough. I don't know why but I always have been. This is beyond just my strength, I am talking about being tough. What this means to our sex life is that he can truly rough me up (spanking, grabbing me very hard, pushing me around, etc) and I never get hurt nor do I bruise. He can't believe how rough he can be on me and he used to be a little worried about it like maybe I was just hiding how hurt I was, or maybe I truly had some kind of masochistic problems...but I don't. I'm just tough. Spank me again, honey, I LOVE IT. At this point, he knows I really do love it and I really am that tough.
And finally...one thing I brought to the table I didn't even know I had until I we were together about 1 years...and that thing is that I can "squirt". The first time it happened, I was shocked. I had heard about this before but it seemed weird and creepy to me and I put no effort into finding out anything else about it. But when it happened spontaneously to me, my life was never the same after that. It felt like nothing I'd ever experienced before. It took some time to figure out how to make it happen when I wanted it to, after that first spontaneous time. But the time spent in trying to figure it out was a lot of fun of course! Now...it is easy for me. It isn't something we go for every time...it has to be planned for because I can literally soak through 4 or 5 folded up bath towels. So we save it for when we know we can savor and enjoy it and make it last for a long time per session.
In all his previous bad boy experiences, my man has never encountered a squirter like I am. He has experienced some of it before, but not like me. I am apparently the squirt queen as well as DanceQueen. LOL! So I get to provide him with a huge turn on - one that he has always wanted to experience - but one which no woman can fake (there is no way to fake it).
There are other things I bring to the table too, but because they would possibly embarass my fiance to disclose them I will not. Just suffice it to say that once you open up a woman to her true inner sexual self, you maybe be surprised about that genie in that bottle. I was a simple, inexperienced woman in a sexless marriage until I was 37 years old. Now I am 41 and I have a better sex life than anything I've seen in porn or read or heard about.
For you guys out there who are starting down this path within your own marriages, you do have some strikes against you...BUT just trust in the process. Have faith in your wife. Believe that she really does have a vixen inside of her, even if she can't see it in there herself. Continue reading and learning. And remember this...when you have an empty nest, it is much easier for her to swing from the chandelier.
