Thanks for the visit, I'mstillhopeful and Phoenix.
With regards to the kids --- I guess I'm lucky in that my D15 would stay with me if I do get divorced. My S21 is thinking of joining the navy, so he will likely be leaving home within the next year, but I am sure he would stay with me too. So, I don't have small kids to worry about, which is fortunate. I am also lucky that I dropped the rope a long time ago --- no expectations of H anymore. I kept hoping that he will step up, but that hope is long gone. I would be extremely surprised if he suddenly became romantic, and showed a deeper, more intimate interest in me. I think I would be suspicious at this point, and would wonder at what was motivating him. This is why I am nervous of any attention from men --- I am scared I will be so grateful for the attention, I'll fall into an A, such has happened in so many cases. I have warned H many times about how I am feeling, but have stopped now, and will not do so again. It all falls on deaf ears, and quite frankly, I think he thinks I am just being silly, and impatient. He just doesn't take me seriously. However, I know that once I decide to leave, there will be no going back. It will be over!
No, I think this is as far as he's going to take it. I will either stay, and swallow what he's willing to give, or leave, and find a new life for myself. Either will be fine with me. As for being celibate --- who knows if that will remain the case forever, but at this point in time, I can't imagine being with anyone else either. I wish I could, but there it is. I am a one-man woman --- once I fall in love, I stay in love, unless something really drastic happens.
Oh well!
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
