FYI: the title is from I'll fall in love again by Sammy Hagar and its one of my favorites.
Talked to H for and hour and 1/2 today and we talked a lot about what needs to happen. He has realized that he has painted himself into a corner and keeps apologizing for how things have turned out. It doesn't do much, but its still nice to hear sometimes. We are going to get his name off of the house and file for LS. I was straight out honest with him and told him that I'm just not really ready to file for D. I'm willing to do the LS, but the D just seems so close to the end. Maybe I'm a fool, but I'll at least be an honest fool. I was shocked to hear him say that he isn't ready for that either. It doesn't get my hopes up or anything, but it was nice to hear.
He also said that he knows he has never treated me right and doesn't think he is capable of it and I told him that if we were to ever try then both of us could learn how to treat the other better. Who knows.
DD is 7 today. It amazing how quickly things can change. 7 years sounds like a long time, but its been the blink of an eye.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I really, really, like your plan. You'll be protected from his current irresponsibility, but you aren't closing the door. I don't know whether he has it in him to really address his issues, but you are giving him a chance. To me, that is a very generous action on your part, and I think he recognizes it. We don't know what he has in him, but as you said, who knows? You never would have expected him to be where he is today, maybe he can surprise you again!
(((Jeff, Dar, GFI and GF))) Thanks to all of you for the birthday wishes for my doodle-bug. We had a pretty good day. H and I took the kids to see Wall-e for DD's birthday. It was really a cute movie but its a love story so that was kinda sad. H even said it was sad. We are still just doing what we always do, talking several times a day and I for one am just trying to keep it light and fun. We seem to be able to talk better than we have in a long time, but I will call bull$hit when I hear it and things aren't so stressful. There were a couple of times when we talked yesterday that I got really sad, because H says things that just hurt, but what do you do?
I'm doing better now than I have since this started so thats about all I can ask for. H keeps making comments about me having a boyfriend. I couldn't find a shirt and he asked me if I left it at my boyfriend's? I know hes kidding, but he brings it up more now. I don't know if he is trying to encourage me to do so or waiting for me to say that I don't have one or don't want one. I really don't, but I wouldn't mind having a distraction...ok, that wasn't nice. Probably not!
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I took D to see Wall*E on Saturday as well. It was a cute movie. Funny how a robot can get how to be romantic and take care of a lady but an H can't huh?
I think in his mind you having a boyfriend would reduce the "wrongness" of what he has done/is doing. I think not biting either way is the right answer. Just don't say anything. Or make a joke.
Jeff knows you soooooo well! Bite that tongue, Mrs. Sugar.
You're doing the best you can. I'm always amazed at how you handle things.
((((((((Corey))))))))
I bite my tongue when I can and other times I just let it fly! Sometimes I'd have to bite my tongue off and throw it out the window and so I digress...oh well!
GFI you are too cute, I did a bad thing today. I was "helping" H hook up his bluetooth and he was in the bathtub so I took the opportunity to read his texts (I haven't done this in months and I really don't know what possessed me to today.) There were a couple from OW that were old (June 4 and June 11) so I found it odd that he would keep them unless he is still trying to get me to think that shes really nice...yeah right. One of them talked about how she was emotional because shes just so scared about having a baby and if they don't end up together how she will be a single mom and how she feels like a homewrecker...maybe thats because you are! It was just odd that he chose to save those two. There of course were none of his responses, lol. He acted like a complete a$$ after the game about some $$ his mom had given me for fireworks then tried to deny he was being a dick. My DS's football team sells tickets for $10.00 each that get you $10.00 worth of fireworks. We have to buy $100.00 and there are 10 tickets. So H informs me tonight that any that are sold, he gets 1/2 of the proceeds which is fine with me. MIL gave me a $50.00 bill tonight for fireworks and H tells me to hand it over...as if! One, only $25.00 of it is for my kids and #2 I'm not going to get stuck buying a bunch of extra fireworks because I've already sold $50.00 worth of tickets and he wants an $80.00 box. He gets all pissy when I told him that I didn't think his mom was buying tickets and he kept telling me, "Use your brain!" So I told him that it must just be so taxing to have to deal with someone as unintelligent as I seem to be. Then he tells later that it was me who made a big deal out of it...WHATEVER!!!!! He just makes me sooo tired sometimes.
You really think he wants me to find a boyfriend then?
Last edited by Sugar and Spice; 07/03/0804:56 AM.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option