Trouble on the lake erie shore #3

[TwinDad]

I would believe that is probably the case. Also your W has quite the mouth on her......lol (assuming the c*** doesn't stand for chic)

I think a lot of the WAW's are hurt very badly but know deep down that they would like to make their M work because they do love their H's. So they want their safety net (i.e. H still willing to be there for them) while they sort things out.

One thing that helped me through it a little bit was to think of it from a love perspective. At some level your W wanting to sep is an act of love. She could probably see that she was having a very hard time dealing with the sitch leading up to it, probably harboring a fair bit of resentment and in a lot of pain. The result of this pain might have been to cause you hurt or treat you in a way that she didn't want to treat you. She might be viewing it as a having a little break might be what she needs to take a step back, remove some pressure and really look at you and the R. Else with the pressure that was happening and your desire to make things right might have smoothered her to the point that her love for you completely died...basically a very slow death.

On the other side, your act of love is to give her the space, be her friend, show her that you are a strong confident male that has made changes in your life.

This is how it has seemed in my sitch. To be honest with you I am in many respects grateful for the little break. It was very difficult, but it really helped us each appreciate one another more and the importance of our M.

One thing that helped me with my patience, becuase I just wanted to "fix" it as well, was to just assume we will never have another R talk again. It took a lot of pressure off me, not to have to think about what we would talk about and when....it allowed me to just be her friend. This isn't to say it wasn't difficult, but it kept me from setting this expectation that there would be this one "magical" R talk that would resolve all of our differences, and we would put all this mess behind us. Instead working on our friendship has done that in a more gradual way.