day by day

[LL44]

Yoyo and Sue, thank you so much. I commented the other day how H is 2 different people, the one he is when he is with us, and the one he is outside of the home.

He has no 'home base' now. He has distanced himself from our house, but is rarely at his dads as well (more at our house physically. In fact I overheard H's stepdad and dad converse about where H spends his nights lol. They had no idea he still stayed at the house a lot). His dads is not ready for the girls, and hot (his dad doesn't like AC), so he hates it there too.

but you think that maybe it's time to stop doing family things together.

We really don't do family things together out, apart from D4's birthday stuff. I think that's why I felt suffocated. He is just at the house a lot. And yes, basically he only has them when I am working, and my panic about him wanting more time than that is subsiding. He loves his single life weekends. Guess what? Works for me, cuz I love seeing the girls when he isn't there.

Part of me is trying to stall and prepare myself, because its very hard to picture H getting his own place and doing it all on his own. Very hard.

Oh and drama drama drama: Former OW constantly calls H. Spending more time with H this weekend, his phone rang like crazy (he leaves it out in the open). I heard the '3 ring ILY' from FOW all day long. H says she calls all the time, asks on VM to see him, etc. He claims he doesn't answer. Um, I think I need to tell OW's H, right??

[Yoyowife]

Oh and drama drama drama: Former OW constantly calls H. Spending more time with H this weekend, his phone rang like crazy (he leaves it out in the open). I heard the '3 ring ILY' from FOW all day long. H says she calls all the time, asks on VM to see him, etc. He claims he doesn't answer. Um, I think I need to tell OW's H, right??

Part of me says yes, do it she deserves to be ratted out and her H deserves to know the truth. But on the other hand I think why not let sleeping dogs lie and let your H and OW deal with their own drama. Isn't OW's H aware of the affair? I think at this point it might be better to just to try to have a peaceful divorce and get your financial needs met by your STBXH. If you make him mad it might cause the divorce to get ugly and expensive. Right now he seems cooperative on splitting everything fairly.

Now...after you get your divorce calling the OW's H may be a thought....

[SallyM]

just swinging by to say hey, lwb!

any more thoughts about telling ow's h? I know you are asking here, just wondering where you are at now?

[fightingirish]

I know what yoyo is saying, but its so sad that the OW H think's they are working things out, while she is doing this behind his back.

Tough call. I can only give you my opinion of what I would do and that would be to tell him. Now you can do this discreetly. There are tons of ways to do it, without giving up your name, even though I know you have spoken to him before.

(((lwb)))

[girlfromipanema]

Thinking of you, lwb.

(((((((((HUGS to you and the girls)))))))

[NoCodeBlues]

nocode, that is amazing about Joyce Meyer's. Maybe you'll need to plan an StL trip!

I would absolutely love to visit StL, if for no other reason than to see you and all the other wonderful DB guys and gals in the area.

And I'd love to see Joyce Meyer in one of her live sermons, but that particular one in your city is targeted for women (probably on "the Confidant Woman" series) -- I guess I could go in drag if I absolutely had to. You and Hope could sneak me in.

Right now I am enjoying her "Battle of the Mind" recorded lectures. (I also like Greg Laurie and Joel Osteen too.)

Your H is just so darn dense. If he doesn't see the wisdom by now of staying away from OW#1 and all her hang-ups, then he's just pathetic. You really must in turn distance yourself from H.

(((Hugs)))

[LL44]

Called OW's H. He was so nice. Surprised, but not really surprised that she is calling my H. OW told him awhile back that she was sad because my H wouldn't take her calls. She also told her H last week she was sad because she couldn't see MY daughter on her birthday. Oooookie dokie? In the next sentence she tells her H she wants to save the marriage. Basically he is numb at the moment, doesn't know what he wants (stay married or not). He says he is in a good place otherwise, going to school and enjoying his kids. We discussed how we were in such 'dark' places last summer, that we never want to relive that. He was glad I called, and said I did the right thing by letting him know, even though he suspected as much.

Glad I called, but that's it for me. No need to call again.

[fightingirish]

lwb,

Im glad you called, its exactly what I would have done. So sad though....WTH>>> she was sad about YOUR daughters birthday????? She's a WACK JOB!! get a life lady!!

You are in such a better place now, and your precious one can move on and enjoy your life.

(((hugs)))

[Dr LOve]

LWB,

about the call. IF someone knew your husband was cheating on you and you thought everything was honky dory would you not want then to call and tell ya?

If I was not pretty sure my W has stopped calling the OFM I know I would do more to expose him to his wife.
BUT in my sitch right now it's like yoyo said. Let the Flea bitten,three legged one eye dog lie.... or is that lay... as poop just kick the dog..

H

[SueS]

Let the Flea bitten,three legged one eye dog lie.... or is that lay... as poop just kick the dog..
H

Husband, You are TOO funny. I love it! Thanks for making me smile so early this fine Thursday morning!

lwb- I think you did the right thing. What an absolute....I don't even know what to call her.....for being sad about missing your D4's b-day. That's just odd. I can't even imagine how I'd feel if my H told me things about missing OW & her family. Just rub it in his face a bit more!

Any big plans for the 4th? Hope you have a good one!

SueS