ms ladybug SQUISHED (2)

[jon2911]

Yikes, that's tough. I don't know what to counsel when it involves s2. Hopefully there's a way to respectfully disagree, but when he's trying to pick a fight it's tough.

I found this on a success story today:
"When he starts talking about your failures and why the marriage was so horrible, much of which is probably true, he is waiting for you to react in anger, hurt, frustration, and let you say horrible things to him, blame him for everything and storm out of the house because this is the type of behavior that validates his thoughts, expectations and rationalizations for walking away. Such behavior will make him feel better. When you DON’T act like this, it will throw him for a loop and he will be completely bewildered. Try it. This doesn’t mean you should be a doormat. This simply means listening and validating his feelings, thoughts and emotions regarding you, him and the marriage. It does not mean that you have to accept ridiculous requests regarding things such as financial or property issues. If these come up, respectfully and calmly disagree. In fact, you can use them to buy time. For example, you might say: “that is not acceptable to me at this point, and it is something we can negotiate or work out in a few weeks, but I am sure we can find an amiable middle ground. I don’t want you to be a bad position. Remember I am your best friend regardless of what happens.”


The best friend part is really tough. I'm struggling with that in my sitch.