red,
I'm sure this is hurting you. I don't know that you need to be SO upbeat all the time.
I know in MY sitch, it would bother my h if I acted like everything was fine. He'd get the idea that I just don't care.

But, my h is quite a unique one...

Me 36
Husband 35
D5
S2
separated:
10/29/07-present
Served divorce papers 1/22/09
"When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."