Changing my perspective...2

[Upside]

Hi kiki-
I think it is great that you are standing up for yourself. It sounds like it is empowering you. We all know when we have crossed that line and you appear to have crossed it. Keep standing strong and letting your H know that you are someone who deserves respect.

(((HUGS)))

Upside

[plentyhope]

Kiki,

Thanks for the kind words. I am glad if I am able to help.

It's great that he emailed your email back, and confirmed that he knows the dates. Did he explain why he called in the email? Maybe he remembered the dates email after he called... maybe he decided to check or read your emails again to check. It's possible he didn't take the dates email to heart before.

It seems that your silence is forcing him to take more notice. I agree that he might be checking to see if you actually mean what you said.

Keep praying, Kiki, for direction.

[Maya44]

For what it's worth, I think you're doing very well Kiki! I need to have the same thought process and let H be as well. We'll both get it though, we deserve respect...as a minimal....from our H's!

[kikifree]

I m just posting this so you all know how crazy my H is:

H called 15 times yesterday. Texted 7. All about the trip.

H asked if he should go..I told him not to take time off. D7 will be available forhim to pick her up next week.

H asked why , if I was not going, etc...

H called and kept asking me to call him but I didnt.

Then h texted me " you are a P***y for not answering the phone.

Then he kept calling after I told him I was done.

At about 11pm he called and left a message again..about if he could pck up D7 from my vacation . This is after I told him no .

well, i texted him that I was going to the place and d& was not. D7 has also told him this.

H then texted me:

Sure she is not...Do not expect to see me or hear from me before the court date. It can not come fast enough. I had it with you.

I texted him back:
perfect.

I had it with him. He is a bully. All of a sudden he wants to see D7 and I cant play his games anymore.

[Upside]

Wow kiki-
Your H sounds like he is losing it and like a spoiled child that isn't getting the reaction that he wants. Amazing.

You are handling things so well letting your H just flap in the wind while you go on with your life.

[kikifree]

THanks Upside.

After three years of this, you just get TIRED of pleasing H. It is I, who has control over my own life. I have not been living for myself. When I set boundaries I usually fail because I feel guilty. I realized it is me who has to stop the madness. As much as I hate being "strong" , I have to.

[plentyhope]

Hi kiki, Good for you for standing up to his bullying. It wasn't right to call you names, and to emotionally blackmail by saying he's looking forward to the court date.

One word of caution: If you're not really done with him, don't say you are. You could say something like what Yellowrose said, e.g. "I will talk to you AFTER you have sorted out your issues and are ready to talk to me in a respectful and civil way."

[MaMaMo]

This one for you KiKifree



I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an' pretend
'cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again

CHORUS
Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman

You can bend but never break me
'cause it only serves to make me
More determined to achieve my final goal
And I come back even stronger
Not a novice any longer
'cause you've deepened the conviction in my soul

CHORUS

I am woman watch me grow
See me standing toe to toe
As I spread my lovin' arms across the land
But I'm still an embryo
With a long long way to go
Until I make my brother understand

Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to I can face anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman
Oh, I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong

FADE
I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong
I am wom

[kikifree]

Hey plenty,
Thank you. I meant to say I was done with the conversation. I am done with him disrespecting me and treating me like I am beneath him.

MaMaMo,

I love it. Thank you! How are you doing?

[MidwesternGirl]

Wow, 15 times????? Amazing.................

Turn your phone off today.