just started reading your thread and thought I'd offer a little different perspective.
IMO, everything your wife is saying to you is what we call the "script" over in infidelity. She's confused and probably would welcome the opportunity to work on M if it weren't for the OM. His presence is a symptom of your M problems, not the cause, but it has everything to do with why you're finding it hard to work on things. She's giving her emotional energy to someone else, feels excited by those new feelings of love, and is probably finding it hard to reconsider a revamped R with you as a viable alternative. Unfortunately, there isn't a whole lot you can do except work on yourself and be the most attractive person you can be FOR YOURSELF. If she starts to realize the grass isn't greener, then she'll be able to evaluate you in a better light. But right now her vision is clouded.
That said, what you posted above sent off all kinds of warning signals. "Princess fragile petal"? You'll never fight? Never argue?
That's not a healthy relationship. Don't place her on a pedestal. You're walking on eggshells and that isn't attractive. There is a difference between validating - listening and accepting someone else's viewpoint - and just agreeing with everything they say. You can validate and still disagree. In fact, you SHOULD do that, because a R is about two people participating.
My $.02. I had to learn this lesson the hard way, but once I did it made things much more comfortable with W. The presence of OM has meant we're still on the road to D, but our interactions are more constructive.
