Mulesqb still getting kicked in the a$$

[mulesqb]

your neighbor is like a toxic cloud. To me..this still borders on an EA. Can't you find a tool from someone else? Who the heck is he to be telling YOU that your sitch is 'going to be OK'.

I know i agree. It's a little different this time.She is talking to both he and his W, not just him. But she is definitely attached to them and would rather spend time with them than her family. She wants me to go on vaca with them in Lake George, just the 4 of us. We would rent separate places but be up there the same time.

patience is your friend.

Unfortunately, it comes and goes. Watching her blow off our children all the time makes it very trying.

Uh....no.
"I'm sorry you feel that way but I would never do that to you. The children love you and there is nothing in the universe that I could or WOULD ever do to change that".

I did say this to her at one point. My comment at first had a hint of sarcasm which i know was a mistake.

That's a good move. That's called LISTENING. Listen more, talk MUCH LESS.

The problem is that she never wants them around - it's bordering on neglect. I'm much better at listening than I was when this started - I always think of you guys when she starts talkking so i keep my mouth shut.

You SHOULD let it out...feel your pain and grief. Don't ignore it.

Thanks - I have really noticed the kids suffering now. They are tired of this and tired of being sent away by her. It breaks my heart. I'm trying to get home earlier from work and I have been taking them to camp this week and getting in late. they really enjoy going to breakfast and hanging out before camp.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU...that these are HER ISSUES...that MLC is out of your control...you will become stronger.

This is the one thing that I do get, thanks to you guys. It helps to be understanding. The problem for me has been that she seems to waver in and out of her old self a lot. The times when she is like her old self are such a tease. That's what ropes me in, because I miss her so much. I know the kids are feeling the same thing, I can see it in her eyes. Then the phone rings and it's the neighbor's W and the MLC alien returns and brings sadness to the house.

Immerse yourself in the kids. Try and let the 'fight for your M' go for a bit.

Thanks FIB - this is where I am right now. But how do i handle her making plans for us this holiday weekend , and the trip to Lake George??