Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Okay, I have replied 3 times now, only to loose my connection! This is really starting to test my patience.
Yes, Ellie, I also believe it can only get better from here on in. Oh sure, I may find a few more hurdles, but something tells me they are going to be a bit more manageable.
Mom of 2,
It's more like a happy beginning for me. I feel I'm able to step more freely into my own future without the constant worry of being dragged into the past. I feel refreshed, and it is a glorious feeling.
G/LR, Yes, I'm dancing too... all around, and back and forth. It's taken me a long time to get here, however, I feel stronger because of it.
Brue, I am glad I gave you something worth while to come and read. I am so happy to share the positives going on right now. I am begin to see clearly once again, as also the time lap between hearing and understanding is nearly non existant. I am comfortable with this situation and feeling stronger every day.
Oh Being, there most definately is a God, and had I only been aware of what I was doing through my prayers, my own situation could have been cleared up much sooner. You see, I know understand when I prayed, I prayed ambiguously, asking for the truth to come out for everyone to see..... well, as I understand it now, it was a pretty tall order, requiring a lot of work and a lot of area..... the reason it has taken this long for my answers. Now,it seems the truth is popping out all over, in places I never expected. Prayer does work, and God works miracles!
Creed, I'm smiling too.... on my face, in my heart, just all over! I've had a chance to speak with Dick twice in the past week or so. Once while he was at work, as I found a resonsible man to talk with.... and the second time, was yesterday, and I found the other guy, Mr. Hyde. Oh sure, he'd been on the road, traveling here with his wife, at the time, his wife was not with him, so I was surprised to find Mr. Hyde. He stopped here at 8:00 am to drop off the rest of S's belongings, the ones he had to leave in Cali in order to fly home on the 15th. Well, he was upset, took S's cell phone, the one he gave him when he originally moved to Cali. Dick kept most if not all of the b-day and Christmas gifts he had given S in the past few years... but did give him his clothing. I had to call Dick and ask him about the camera I had given S for his last B-day, and Dick stammered all over the place, making excuses for his behavior. I didn't even feel the need to respond to his lies... didn't care, just made my point, then hung up.
Dick and his wife are here to visit her children.... they are hoping to bring them back to Cali for a couple of weeks, but from the sounds of it, the only person they will be bringing back to Cali with them is Dick's own Father. It seems all six children (my two and her four) have seen them for who they are, and really don't want anything to do with them, and their lifestyle.... the only one who may not have a choice is her baby, and she is too young to voice her opinion in court just yet.
All I can say is he got what he deserved, and I had did nothing to promote the kids' feelings.... they did that all on their own.
Well... once again I thank my very special cheerleaders! Without you, I would have never had made it this far. My sincerest appreciation to you all!
Love,
Laughing
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you.........
Laughing - I had Margaritas with Dust in the Wind last night, and she asked how you were doing. (I was glad to be able to report you had both your kids with you). So here's a hello from her.
Somehow I missed this post. I am so happy to hear that your X got what he deserved. My friends have told me throughout these 4 years that the kids will see what the truth is and eventually H will be the loser. Throughout the D process everything went his way. He continues to lash out at me and tries to get me to react most of the time. I don't anymore and through much prayer and many changes in me, the latest round of hearings are not necessarily going the way he wants them to. My issues with H are not nearly as bad as your. H is still deep in MLC and the only way he knows to "hang on" to me and keeping a connection is through anger. God has his way in the end always. Good luck on your "new beginning"
Everything happens for a reason, maybe Dad needs to find that it isn't better out there, he needs to realize how good he had it here. Maybe he will find God and that is the most important thing when he finds Him he will know he is supposed to come home.
MMMM Margaritas! Sounds like fun Ellie, I am glad to see you out and about and having fun. How is Dust? I'm happy to hear from her, even if it comes through the "grapevine"....
Yes, we are doing very well. Yes, there has been some adjustments, teenage testing of boundaries/rules... i.e. curfews and such, but we are finding peace and happiness. S said the other night, "It feels so good to be real, I mean, the real me again." The look on his face was priceless.
He came home wired tight, meaning full of nervous tension or energy, he didn't sleep well for a while, but now he seems to be settling quite nicely and looking forward once again.
More good news.... not only did I receive a raise last month at work, but then the company turned around and gave everyone $1.50/hr raise on top of what I had already received! Bonus!! My company paid medical insurance kicked in July 1 ~ something I thought I'd never have again.... and for the last bit of good news, the child support is being refigured and a hearing is scheduled for July 30.... finally, the financial security is now seeping in. I'm still not going to be rich, but as my S said "Money can't buy you happiness, that's one thing I've learned for sure!"
Yes, Ellie, we are doing very well!
Laughing
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you.........
Yes, I can tell you with first hand experience, the children do see the truth, and will remember how we handle things also. I also know they do attach themselves to the most positive parent, they will also cling to the parent who is spoken poorly about, as they will feel the desire or need to defend that parent also...
Keep taking the high road, even though it is the most difficult road to travel. All the work and effort you put into taking the high road, will come back to you 10 fold.
Yes, you are absolutely right, your H IS holding on with everything and anything he can, and using his anger is a common way of holding on.... although, it really doesn't make sense, does it? My C told me Dick's anger is in direct relation to the amount of regret he has for what he has done. I said "Say what???" He said, "Oh ya, he's not a happy man" I said, "Well, that's a no brainer, but he has everything he said he wanted, including a wife who'd chose him over her own children." He said "If he was happy with his life the way it is today, he wouldn't be dragging you back to court, wouldn't waste the energy in making you out to be the bad guy." Then he answered the question that had been boggling my mind for a long time.... Which is why Dick didn't go after his other ex-wife like he has with me.... It was because he was actually happy in our life.
So, with all this said, keep in mind, and smile to yourself while knowing, the angrier your x gets, the more he misses you and your family, and somehow realizes he's screwed up, but his defense mechanisms are keeping him from seeing even his own truth!
Laughing
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you.........
