Kind of a miserable day today. I had my son for most of the day and we had lots of fun. He kicked my butt in monopoly and he didn't cheat this time...lol. Didn't get the chance to play paintball because I am just so tired today, got maybe 3 hours of sleep last night. It is going to be a rough weekend because I finally am switching to day shift and am on a night shift schedule. My shift starts at 5 am and that is normally the time I either get home or go to sleep
The interaction with the wife was pleasant. She called to ask if our S was being good and we started talking about how good he is at monopoly. She then proceeded to tell me about how busy work was and that she was going to go get something to eat. She kept telling me sorry that I didn't get any sleep and for having to keep my S. I told her to not apologize because I love having him and that there is plenty of time to sleep later. And the thank you's just kept coming, was very nice to hear her say thank you! She almost sounded like the old W I once knew.
But when she came to pick him up she wanted me to bring him out. She usually comes up and talks for a couple of minutes. I don't know why I am letting that bother me...maybe it is because of a lack of sleep?
Wow the wife must be sick today! Just got off the phone with her and she would not shut up She wanted to apologize for not staying to talk as my D was in a hurry to meet up with the boys. I told her not to sweat it that all was cool on my end. She asked if I was mad because she did not sta, and of course I said no.
She then proceeded to tell me about how work was again and that she has more stuff to do as this is a busy month for her with all the renovatins.
Then she insists on telling me about her trip to California. Of all days she is leaving is on my birthday But she does not know if she wants to go or stay. I told her to go and have fun to get away from everything because she has a lot on her plate right now. She almost sounded like she was asking me if she could go. She also was assuring me that she is not going out there to hook up with another guy so I don't have to worry about that, I told her that it is not my place to worry about that stuff I just worry thatshe is ok by herself.
Then we started to talk about her court appearence tomorrow for her DUI. She goes to the state court to lose her license and asked what she should do. I said there is nothing you can do but suffer the consequences they hand down. Anything else we will figure it out as we go. I just reassured her that I will be here for her in whatever she needs. If she ever feels like talking about it tha I have an open ear for her.
Oh well that made my night just peachy to hear her "normal" self again. I am going to hit the hay now hope everyone has a good night!
Well here is the latest update on my journey! W calls me today at work and asked if I was going to leave soon. I replied yes in about 15 minutes, to which she replied are you hungry...of course I said I was starving. She told me she had steaks on the grill for me... I am like WTF, for me. So she asked me to stop by and eat, which I did.
Food was awesome and we had a good time talking and playing with the kids. Well I basically have been up for 24 hours and am in need of sleep and I told the W that I was going to go home to get some sleep. She threw me a pair of my old swim trunks and said lets go swimming with the kids. I did and we had a blast, and then the tiredness started to catch up. I said I really need to get going or I am going to pass out.
Then W asks me if I feel uncomfortable around her at the house. I replied absolutely not I am having fun. So then she starts asking me questions like who am I hanging out with and where do we go. I said friends from work is who I mainly hang out with and she knows the spots where we go. Then comes the kicker, she asks ave a girlfriend :0 wtf!! My reply to this was that I told you in the very beginning of this mess that I would remain faithful and 100% honest until we figure this out. She didn't want to quit and asked me 2 more times who she was. I just smiled and pulled her floaty(sp) over to me and looked her in the eyes and said you know exactly how I deel for you and this situation, and I told you I would remain faithful to you! She also kept asking me if I was mad at her for this and if I was still sad. I said no to both and told her that I was just getting on with my life.
She just smiled at me and we changed subjects. Then I was excusing myself and told her thank you for the beautiful meal and the swim but I need to get some sleep. She asked if I was mad and to that I replied why would I be upset, of course I am not just tired and need sleep!!
I am wondering should I send her an e-mail telling her more in depth of what I meant by moving on. I didn't mean it to sound like I have given up on her but I am afraid that may be the way she interprets it!
I am hoping this is her reaching out and opening up more to me, but I could be reading this wrong...any thoughts.
Wow the wife must be sick today! Just got off the phone with her and she would not shut up She wanted to apologize for not staying to talk as my D was in a hurry to meet up with the boys. I told her not to sweat it that all was cool on my end. She asked if I was mad because she did not sta, and of course I said no.
She then proceeded to tell me about how work was again and that she has more stuff to do as this is a busy month for her with all the renovatins.
Then she insists on telling me about her trip to California. Of all days she is leaving is on my birthday But she does not know if she wants to go or stay. I told her to go and have fun to get away from everything because she has a lot on her plate right now. She almost sounded like she was asking me if she could go. She also was assuring me that she is not going out there to hook up with another guy so I don't have to worry about that, I told her that it is not my place to worry about that stuff I just worry thatshe is ok by herself.
Then we started to talk about her court appearence tomorrow for her DUI. She goes to the state court to lose her license and asked what she should do. I said there is nothing you can do but suffer the consequences they hand down. Anything else we will figure it out as we go. I just reassured her that I will be here for her in whatever she needs. If she ever feels like talking about it tha I have an open ear for her.
Oh well that made my night just peachy to hear her "normal" self again. I am going to hit the hay now hope everyone has a good night!
Stay strong!
Ted
Ted you are doing great. She gave you your answer as to why she didn't stay good thing you didn't pull a Racefan move & start to assume LOL! The interactions of the last 2 days are definitely PMA days, but stay with low expectations. You answered her comment about hookin up very well IMOm, you could have freaked but you didn't good job bro.
Keep doing what your doing and stay the path man, some real good positives now work within those you will be okay.
Well I basically have been up for 24 hours and am in need of sleep and I told the W that I was going to go home to get some sleep. She threw me a pair of my old swim trunks and said lets go swimming with the kids. I did and we had a blast, and then the tiredness started to catch up. I said I really need to get going or I am going to pass out.
Then W asks me if I feel uncomfortable around her at the house. I replied absolutely not I am having fun. So then she starts asking me questions like who am I hanging out with and where do we go. I said friends from work is who I mainly hang out with and she knows the spots where we go. Then comes the kicker, she asks ave a girlfriend :0 wtf!! My reply to this was that I told you in the very beginning of this mess that I would remain faithful and 100% honest until we figure this out. She didn't want to quit and asked me 2 more times who she was. I just smiled and pulled her floaty(sp) over to me and looked her in the eyes and said you know exactly how I deel for you and this situation, and I told you I would remain faithful to you! She also kept asking me if I was mad at her for this and if I was still sad. I said no to both and told her that I was just getting on with my life.
She just smiled at me and we changed subjects. Then I was excusing myself and told her thank you for the beautiful meal and the swim but I need to get some sleep. She asked if I was mad and to that I replied why would I be upset, of course I am not just tired and need sleep!!
I am wondering should I send her an e-mail telling her more in depth of what I meant by moving on. I didn't mean it to sound like I have given up on her but I am afraid that may be the way she interprets it!
I am hoping this is her reaching out and opening up more to me, but I could be reading this wrong...any thoughts. Ted
Hi Ted,
OK this is just what Bill (Bworl) and I think Racefan was saying. You are lucky she didn't curse you out this time and she is reaching out to try to communicate.
When you turn her down, you don't know you are but this is how she feels. Stop saying you have to go because you are tired, saying no to staying to eating to meeting cousins, etc because you are tired.
Next time you are tired, tell her you need to take a little nap, should you go home or would it be OK if you lie down here for a little while?
The reason she is asking about another woman is because when you decline she interprets that as you still not pursuing her to get her back.
Of course you want her but remember she felt ignored and that is why she left. So if you want to change things FOR NOW and FOR THE FUTURE RELATIONSHIP, you need to start now.
Yes email her, but not an explanation about you moving on. Email her a romantic e-card about her being the only one or something. And then do not contact her again, wait until she contacts you after receiving it.
P.S. My computer is in a deep sleep because of spyware and have a friend coming over today to hopefully fix it (it may take longer). I'm at the library right now on a timed computer so if I don't get back to you for a while you'll know why.
I understand the whole leaving because I am tired but believe me I was falling asleep in the pool! I am not kidding when I say I have had only 6 hours of sleep in the past 3 days!!! NO LIE!
I was switched to day shift but am still on the night shift sleep schedule, now I go to work at 5am instead of getting home at 5 am then sleeping.
Here is the text I sent to my wife: I apologize for leaving but I am dead tired, hope I didn't come across as being crabby. Thank you for the meal it was delicious! I had alot of fun today. Here is her response: I understand you are dead tired it was unfair they only gave you 1 day to adjust:( I had fun to so did the kids, I am glad you came :)) I will talk to you later.
So atleast she was understanding that I wanted to stay but just couldn't function, but believe me if I could have stayed I would have stayed much longer!!
Thanks for the reply Tink, hurry and get your puter fixed I miss chatting with ya!!
Man Thursday is going to be kind of hard for me. It is my b-day and it will be different this time around, much different. They say the first of everything is the hardest when going through this and vethey are right!! At least I get to spend it with my kids and take myself out to eat lol!
My question to all of you is what kind of cake shall I get...and should I put all 34 candles on or should I keep it at 21 ? :))
OK well I just called the wife and asked her to dinner tomorrow! I called her up and asked if she had plans for tomorrow, she said no why? So I say well I was thinking you and I meet for dinner at 7pm I will pick you up! She started laughing and said ok, where are we going, to which I replied there is a nice McDonalds down the street from me and she started to laugh again.
She asked if the kids were coming and I said not this time, I am taking them out on my b-day. She said she will need to find a sitter for our S, to which I replied already taken care of...heh had this planned already!
So hopefully everything goes well, I feel like I am back in high school and just asked the prettiest girl to the prom. Although I feel giddy like a kid I have very low expectations of anything, but am looking for a nice evening out with the W. No R talks just general chit chat!!!
She wanted to apologize for not staying to talk as my D was in a hurry to meet up with the boys. I told her not to sweat it that all was cool on my end. She asked if I was mad because she did not sta, and of course I said no.