Wow, apparently Whatis is now able to give decent advice on surviving! I guess when you're able to give advice it means you've moved to a good place So, I will continue, seeing as how I'm on a roll! After you've been burned badly, as most of us here have been, it's very difficult to feel significant. My STBX spent years pounding into me that I wasn't significant, that I wasn't desirable...you know the rest! Yesterday, I attended church and bible study and I realized again how incredible it is to be part of a place that says YOU'RE SIGNIFICANT. While you're rebuilding your own identity and feelings of self worth this is so empowering to feel. I went to the morning bible study and it ended about 20 minutes before the church service, so I went to my normal seat and waited. During that 20 minutes I counted 12 people who approached me to greet me, inquire about me etc. and/or introduce themselves. It just amazes me that so many people took the time to say, in a small way, "you're significant". When I left early to go pick up my girls there was a tent set up outside to serve hotdogs and hamburgers, as Canada Day is approaching here. I waved at a Prayer group buddy who was helping set up. I told him I couldn't stay as I had to pick up the girls, so he took me to the stand and asked the servers to give me hotdogs to take for myself and my girls. The server wasn't sure whether she should or not, as the service was not over but my friend politely insisted "Brother Whatis really has to go so it'll be OK to start a little early for him" So off I went with lunch for the kids. Again, this man said through his actions "you are significant". It matters folks, look for places such as this where you feel cared for, it's worth the initial discomfort of seeking out a "happy place". So those are my gems for today! Btw, the DB site is one of those wonderful places too!
So, I will continue, seeing as how I'm on a roll! After you've been burned badly, as most of us here have been, it's very difficult to feel significant. My STBX spent years pounding into me that I wasn't significant, that I wasn't desirable...you know the rest! Yesterday, I attended church and bible study and I realized again how incredible it is to be part of a place that says YOU'RE SIGNIFICANT. While you're rebuilding your own identity and feelings of self worth this is so empowering to feel. I went to the morning bible study and it ended about 20 minutes before the church service, so I went to my normal seat and waited. During that 20 minutes I counted 12 people who approached me to greet me, inquire about me etc. and/or introduce themselves. It just amazes me that so many people took the time to say, in a small way, "you're significant". When I left early to go pick up my girls there was a tent set up outside to serve hotdogs and hamburgers, as Canada Day is approaching here. I waved at a Prayer group buddy who was helping set up. I told him I couldn't stay as I had to pick up the girls, so he took me to the stand and asked the servers to give me hotdogs to take for myself and my girls. The server wasn't sure whether she should or not, as the service was not over but my friend politely insisted "Brother Whatis really has to go so it'll be OK to start a little early for him" So off I went with lunch for the kids. Again, this man said through his actions "you are significant". It matters folks, look for places such as this where you feel cared for, it's worth the initial discomfort of seeking out a "happy place". So those are my gems for today! Btw, the DB site is one of those wonderful places too!