Instincts can be right on but I know of one situation where a person decided to give the guy a second look. The second look led to the beginning of a very good relationship, still going strong.
This advice allowed me to take a second look at my first post D attempted "relationships." Although it did not go very far, I learned a lot and we became good friends. What I learned from this experience helped me greatly in the next exploration of a R. Though the second experience resulted in my determining that this second lady was not a match, it too was very helpful in helping me to know what is NOT a match for me in the future.
As for actually saying "thanks but no thanks:" In my first situation, we were talking over the phone and she spoke saying, "I just feel comfortable as friends." I respected her feelings and stopped the "courting" process and severly scaled back our communication outside of the social context at church.
The second situation was more complicated and we were talking on the phone and really not on the same page at all. I pretty much thought we came to the same conclusion, "that we were not a good fit." Afterwards, she seemed to want to continue the relationship but I knew we should not and indicated so over the phone and in that conversation she needed to end the abruptly. I communicated back via text after the convesation ended. The next morning she replied that she would not contact me any more. (20 years earlier, we had a 2 year relationship and I felt it would not be good to continue as friends while seeking to one day marry another woman).
So, that's one perspective. I wish you well
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18
