Real life is----part 5

[Starshyne]

Hello everyone,

I respect your opinion, but for me telling people is the best thing I can do for myself. I felt like for 8 months I was part of the lie and now I am honest and open about everything that I have been keeping inside and it is a big relief.

Tomorrow is a big, scary day. At 3:30 I go to the lawyer with my H and the 3 of us go over the settlement and if he signs it then it is offical. I will be legally divorced on Tuesday. He still will have a certain about of days to get his things out of the house and move out, but I will be divorced. If he doesn't sign the settlement then this will drag on and on through the court and it will me months. I am scared. At the same time I want him to sign and I don't want him to sign. But I know that him signing is the best thing. But you know there is this part of me that just wants to hold onto him, even though he is just a shell of who he used to be. I wish you all could have gotten to know the man I married and not the strange girl tshirt wearing freak I talk of now. He was really a great guy. I have so many wonderful memories that no one can take from me. So everyone please think of me because I am scared out of my mind about tomorrow.

Sara