It must be hard to know what to do/say for the best...and so much of this seems out of your control. Things seem so crazy right now it must be very tempting to step in and try to straighten things out.
IMO you need to formulate plan - something to underpin how you are going to tackle the next few weeks...things might seem easier if you have some guiding principles to operate to-and which has as its focus stuff you can influence - ie. you.
If you haven't come across them already search this board for SmartCookies now infamous post on the feelings of a WAW and also search out Sandi2 who has a fabulous list of do's and dont's.
Seriously, I suggest heading to the bettermen site and looking for the 8 Tools That’ll Change Your Life - and also the marriage builders site. Also, search out Arthur on this site.
Don't dwell on or look for hope in the mentions of things which seem contrary to the sitch you're in - this may be W wanting to find out what it feels like when she says these things - or for any number of unfathomable reasons.
Keep calm and make sure you set out a GAL plan - what do you like doing for you?
I wear my ring - but W does not. I tried not wearing mine but it did not feel right to me.
Best - GFI
Me: 40ish W: 40ish Together: 20 ish years Married: 10ish Years
