Where is the real me? What do I want?

[Purple]

Help! I just got a text from h. It was in reply to one I sent him this morning.

My text(s) this morning were:
My First text: "Scared text to follow. Hope its not too confusing. P"

My second text which immediately followed the first: "Is there a middle ground for us between fighting, not talking, me running away, etc. and the other extreme of having sex, expectations, confusion, etc.? What I am doing now is shutting myself off completely from you which is safer for me but not healthy in the long run. I'm scared. I want to ask for you to be okay with baby steps and allow me to feel safe to retreat when I get scared or confused and not use my fears against me later.."

His reply 12 hours later:
"Purple, I have changed significantly in the last 2 months and although I sometimes slip, those changes are still there. I have tried to cultivate something between us these last 3 or so weeks and have felt pushed away on most occasions. You now say you are shutting off completely. Ok you can run away...again. You can retreat with your dignity. Allow me to do the same. There is only so much rejection/emotional unavailability that I can take. I believe I've reached that limit. Lets just move on now and do the best we can for d7 and for ourselves."

Faaark....just great. I was aiming for a way to be able to talk about what I feel and why I'm scared and not trusting and suspicious of his changes. Instead, he's taken offense. See what I mean? We just can't talk straight to each other. God...this is just too hard.

the man just doesn't understand where I am coming from.