Gypsy, I'm having a hell of a time finding a solution-based therapist. I'm still looking. I don't like to burden my friends with my situation. Also, most don't even know what's going on... only a select few, but I don't want to bring them down with my sad little story. Good things are happening for them and I like them to feel happy. They care about me and worry about me... I don't want them to worry. I'll get this figured out. Besides, this is what my amazing and beloved DB friends are for, is it not?
I won't make any sudden moves, but living with all of this unknown B.S. is taking its toll. This morning my husband dashed out of the house early (he usually doesn't arrive to the office until 10). When I arrived at work at 8, the OW wasn't here... that raised my suspicions, since she's always here early. She still hasn't arrive and neither has my husband. It's 9:45 on the west coast. So, my mind starts playing crazy games with me trying to figure out what the hell is happening.
Is he at the bank with her co-signing for her new home? Are they having a romantic interlude? Is it just a coincidence that they both aren't here? Is he meeting with a divorce lawyer?
If I knew the facts, I would know which direction to take. As things are, I feel like I'm running in circles in my head. I wish someone would just tell me what to do.
M: 37 H: 36 Married: Aug 13, 2004 Decision to Divorce: July 20, 2008 Reconciled: September 2008 Current: Ambivalence
