Michelle, we cross-posted yesterday and I just now realized it, sorry for the delayed reply! You make a good point about the pressure thing. Potential new boss is already putting on a TON of pressure so more from me is probably not great.
JAK - yes, he's a really good mechanic and those are extremely hard to find these days. There are lots of "just out of school" ones, but not many with as much experience and work ethic as my H has. I think a lot of them get sick of the physical labor and move onto other things too - my H likes the physical aspect though.
I can tell he's struggling so hard with this decision. He's talking like it's a done deal (i.e. thinking about how much his 'final paycheck' with current employer will be), but sometimes not in a good way. He says sadly that his current job is "the best one I've ever had." It's hard for me to bite my tongue when he says stuff like that - because this current job is also where his "unhappiness" seemed to start, and where he suddenly had young skanky women throwing themselves at every guy in the place, and 21 year olds inviting him out "bar hopping" and he started feeling "old," re-living his "youth" and such.
Anyway... I asked why he felt that way and he said because it has heat in the winter, A/C in the summer, and it's really clean. I can totally understand why those are big deals to him - but lately, he's making 1-3 hours a day. Not exactly enough to live on.
He's talked to his current company about it and they're putting some pressure on, too. He was apparently hoping they'd make some sort of counter-offer but they didn't. They said they don't want to lose him but they have too many mechanics and not enough work right now (duh). So... not exactly a "threat" but it was in a roundabout way, telling him that if he leaves they won't re-hire him anytime soon. I think he was hoping to "try out" the new job but keep the door open at the old one (ha... as I typed that I realized the irony... sound familiar at all????).
I said I was sorry about the counter-offer, and added that from my perspective the only offer of value would be guaranteeing him a certain # of hours per week anyway (something his company would NEVER do). If there's no work, there's no work - at this rate they could offer him $500 an hour and it wouldn't be enough if he can only make an hour a week (exaggeration to make the point, but a valid point for sure). He thought about that for a minute and said it was true. not much value in saying you make $XX per hour if you don't make any hours. I hope that wasn't putting even more pressure. It's a balancing act between helping him think it through vs. feeling pushed into something. He just kept repeating that he was afraid of leaving the best job he's ever had.
The "right" decision is pretty obvious but it's also one he doesn't want to make... keeping my fingers crossed, though. He has to let potential new boss know by Sunday.
Oh... another plus, last night he realized potential new employer doesn't have a retirement plan and asked me to research options for him (it's my company's specialty). Potential boss asked me to send the results of my research over - said he should probably already be offering this but H is the first person to push it. So now they may not only offer him a substantial amount of both money and work, they may also institute a retirement plan just to get him there! Wow.
OK sorry that is way too much rambling about H's job prospects. I am just so darned excited he might leave where he is now, I can't shut up about it!!
In positive R news... part of the job discussion involved us talking about how many of his co-workers are losing their cars, facing losing their homes, really struggling, and how he's so happy that "we" are in a good financial position and not facing those things. Yay!! I was furiously cooking/prepping for the races this weekend after the retirement research and he kept thanking me, telling me how much he appreciated me, etc. And even helped with some of the prep work.
Last but not least... last week he said that friend (and potential new boss actually) invited us to a 4th of July party. We always, always do something on the water for the 4th - rafting, boating, whatever. I look forward to it all year. Even the past 2 bad years, we did something together on the water, and in a couple of R talks H has told me that those were "great days" with me. So.. he told me about the invite and I got a little sad. I was contemplating my reply and finally just said "So no chance of us getting out on the water this year?" H looked disappointed (I think more because I was disappointed as opposed to because he really wanted to go - friend's party is a block party and we wouldn't know ANYONE except the host and his wife). Then he said "Well maybe" and looked thoughtful. We hadn't talked about it again, but last night, right in the midst of frantic racing prep and tough job talks, H says "I have quite the 4th planned! What do you think about a day out on a 45 foot yacht, awesome fireworks show, and running up and down the river on a dinghy?" (he knows that while I like the "hanging out on the boat" thing I'd far rather be having fun DOING something). WOW!!! I know exactly what he's talking about - his Dad's boat - but the way he was saying it all excited and like it was a "sly" plan was just so cool.
Whew... lotsa journaling there! Getting it all out before I'm offline for the weekend.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
I think a lot of them get sick of the physical labor and move onto other things too - my H likes the physical aspect though. 
