Is there a glimmer of hope for I'mstillhopeful ?

[I'mstillhopeful]

Well, thinking that there might be a glimmer of hope was far too optimistic. H has been making less and less contact recently although he now has internet access at his apartment. He telephoned on Tuesday night to suggest that I take one of the vacations and he take the other.

Although previously he had appeared to be wanting to keep the information about our change in status somewhat private, he was pushing really hard during the conversation to tell our friends who would be on the trip that "we had decided to separate and that we were both OK". Apparently he had already made the decision that we will not be going together. Either I will take both alone, or, we each will do one.

He did mention that his new status was "a difficult transition." And, that he had not slept at all well the previous night. I'm beginning to think that once again, the OW is pressuring him. (In December I saw an e-mail in which she threatened that if he were to go with me on the April vacation she would be done.)

Three times during our conversation he used the same word: "inappropriate" regarding our traveling together. Although he maintains there is no one else in his life the telephone record disproves that. When we were deciding whether to take the April vacation he stated that we would be going as friends not as lovers, and at that time he had told me there was someone else in his life about whom had feelings. I really get the feeling that she has told him that it would be "inappropriate" to go on vacation with his wife.

We are supposed to have dinner together tomorrow night, for the first time since parting in England in April. The agenda is to discuss the October situation.