Hi, sorry that you're going through this. Just wanted to give my opinion.
It sounds like your W is confused right now, she needs a bit of space and some time. It's a great sign that she expresses her love for you! Have you read DR? Maybe she is waiting for you to make some changes? (since I don't know what got you to this point, I can't really give my opinion on that).
I think that you should lend her the money. If it works out between you then you wouldn't worry about the money, right? If it doesn't, then take it out of her portion of your settlement if she doesn't pay you back.
