Maryangela - He has to tell himself all this BS because otherwise, he has to face what a fool he's being. And he must think he's a BIG fool, because he's really reaching on some of this stuff.
Frankly, he sounds a little more mentally unbalanced than the typical WAH. Almost Tourette's-like. (Which can go with OCD).
It is common, though, for the WAS to feel like you "forced" them to have an affair. After all, they weren't happy, they don't know why, so they look around for a reason and the first thing they see is their spouse. So YOU must be the reason they're unhappy, and therefore, YOU caused them to cheat and end up in the mess of divorce.
It is usually a sad thing when they realize later that OP doesn't keep them happy either, and that the unhappiness is within them and travels with them wherever they go.
I repeat my prior advice - this guy is so unhinged, so abusive, that you should be very circumspect about your life until the divorce is final.
