You are getting some excellent advice from Sandi....listen carefully.
I have been in a similar situtation. The main piece of advice I can give you is realize that you are not driving the car. Let your W drive the car. The better you are at letting her drive the R the quicker this will run its course. Don't give her R directions or even talk about where you are going. If she talks about it then validate and listen. I wouldn't initiate any unnecessary converations (text, or otherwise) but I would typically respond to hers in a friendly manner (sometimes waiting, sometimes immediately). I basically took things at her pace, if she was quick to respond to a text then I would be.....else I would wait.
I have so far been very fortunate in that the sep only lasted about 2-3 weeks, but this can take several months. A lot of it has to do with how determined she is and how well you ride along.
It sounds like you have a pretty good grip on what to do. Just don't even think about the R and don't bring it up
Also don't believe everything she says about her determination to get a D. My W told me several times that she made up her mind and it was over. But when I would go to leave her eyes would say something else. Just keep your cool.
One of the biggest keys is evaluate your technique/approach all the time. If you get a negative feedback then don't do that anymore. Ie. if going dark is your approach then don't stick to it if your W is becoming hostile about it. I personnally think people try to go dark way to early (I guess because it sounds cool...I don't know) and end up damaging the friendship they still share with their W. I tried the dark approach for two nights and did not like the result...I switched to best friend and was back living in her house in 3 weeks and we just put an offer on a house together less than 2 months after "she had made up her mind and she was just going to file for divorce"
One other thing that might help prep you for this vacation with your D. I took my 2 yr old twins on a vacation the first week of the sep. I had read DR right before and I was determined to apply some of those principals to work. I went a little dim and it worked a bit. I noticed that she contacted me more and more as the week went on...about silly stuff like she was going to get her hair done, etc. I had mentally prepped myself for the trip. I was prepared to take an extra long time to get things done (you try to drag a pair of 2 year olds away from the swimming pool....lol), I was prepared for missing my W. I wasn't prepared for how much I would miss sharing the experiences with kids were having with the one person who shared the same love for them as I did. We still had a great time, but that sharing was a huge part that I didn't anticipate.....memories that we wouldn't be able to sit back and laugh about together.
Best wishes
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
