I say I will put my foot down, but it's not quite that easy. W is, as I have mentioned, a major control freak. The primary reason I acquiesced on so many things during our marriage -- finances, budgeting, decisions on schooling, schedules, etc -- was not because I was incompetent (I was in charge of all that and more long before I met W) but because it seemed to cause everyone so much less stress. But in retrospect, I truly see how it has caused more harm than good. W has gotten worse about stressing over her control of things.
So as I begin to assert my rights & responsibilities over our two S's, W is going to freak out. I see this causing an avalanche of animosity and poor behavior by W. I've gotten plenty of this already as W sees me acting more and more independently of her "wishes".
She totally denies this, but there is no other explanation for much of her reaction. Our MC/IC pegged her key problem exactly.
