Well, shortly after my WAW came home from work and joined us for dinner, I asked her if she would have time tonight to talk about a few things. She had told me earlier in dinner that she would be going over to a friends late in the evening so I thought in between the kids going to bed and her getting ready would be a good time. She said yes, which was nice. Well, I also said that I need to run out for a few and she asked when and I said whenever but if W were to bathe kids, I could run out now and be back in time to lay them down. W said okay, it has been my normal routine. I said well, it shouldn't have been and W said, well it was. I said I would wait until after I bathed them and W said she didn't want to feel the guilt. So, she started the bath water while I was still in the kitchen cleaning up. A few minutes passed and I went to the bathroom door and asked if it was okay for me to leave and there was no answer. A few minutes passed, the water was still running, I thought maybe she was downstairs so I went to the bathroom to turn off the water. W was in the br crying. Not good.
In anycase, when I got back from picking up fruit for the kids, I got them into bed and did some quick chores around the house. W was on couch resting so I went outside to read. When I came in for more water, she said why don't we talk and I said now is not good. You are resting and will be leaving soon. She insisted so I sat down and said, I have been reading a lot on parenting and fatherhood and it's interesting watching the behaviours of the kids and that I am beginning to understand some things. I asked her if she has read any parenting books, to which she replied...No. I still want a divorce.
Well, I just said, that is not what I wanted to talk about tonight and I went back outside. W went downstairs to get ready.
Time passed and she came outside before leaving and we actually had quite a pleasant conversation until she brought up how uninvovled (W POV) I had been with the kids and I said, I can't change the past but I am enjoying the present and am looking forward to being a great father in the future. She asked if I wanted to talk about our separation. I said no. There is nothing to talk about and changed to the topic to the pleasant evening. She left to go out shortly thereafter.
It's interesting because these two simple conversations allowed my anxiety level to decrease. I went to bed feeling at ease and awoke to some pleasant short conversations/inquiries with the WAW.
Still difficult balancing GAL when her POV is one that I was never around helping.
I read several more chapters in my happiness book last night. Nothing too insightful, just the already familiar.
Is there anyone in a similar sitch where WAW is still live-in, there are kids, and having issues with GAL. Any advice would be appreciated.
Me 34 W 33 D 4 S 2 M 5 T 8 Bomb 6/17/08 Served 7/17/08 I hate Tuesdays! Current Thread
