Guilty as charged.. I am a WAW.

[Bridgestone]

More late night phone calls.. however, this time my phone was on silent! The kids were here so I was not worried about missing a call if something was up with them. Why he didn't call the house phone I don't know, but he did not!

I returned his call this morning and we talked for a bit. He is working again this week-end and next, even though he is suppose to take every other week-end off to have the kids (& show himself & me that he is NOT a work-aholic) this will make 5 week-ends in a row, next will be 6. So it will be almost 2 months since he has had the kids for a full week-end and not worked. sigh..

So when he tells me he has changed, that he does not work as much or as long and I see this pattern, seemingly headed back to where he was, it is discouraging. I can not live with someone that works 7 days a week for 2 months and then takes a day off reluctantly. It is lonely, I need quality time as my love language and I feel unloved.

He said he would like to take me on a bike ride, pack a picniclunch and find a scenic spot to eat it. I said great. Why don't you plan it and let me know a few days ahead when that is going to work for you & the weather. He was really quiet and then made a comment about the floods & mosquitos along the trail, etc. and the kids schedules, and.. and ... and..

I said, well your choice. It sounds like fun to me, we could even go geocaching (something I really like to do & he has told me that he wants to go along now) if you let me know where you want to biking to . I'll wait for you to plan it and give me few days notice. Again, silence from him.

So I said, "well, I need to run and get my day started, I'll see you later when you pick up D". He told me he loved me and some more things that were our 'code words' for wanting sex.

I was neutral with my response, something about thanks for thinking of me that way. and rang off.

Putting the ball in his court to do the planning is definately a 180 for me. I am the planner, the organizer, the to-do lister, the calander updater, person. so for me to agree to go do something with him, but tell him to take care of the detailes is definately out of character for me, but you know what?

I liked it. I will not fret about it getting done. If he does it he does it. If not, then his loss and I may just plan a bike outing with D for this week-end or next anyway.