Are you ready to jump?

[runningoutoftime]

Unfotunately, the only thing you can do when a parent is irresponsible is to encourage and teach the kids to be responsible for themselves. Remind and tell the kids how important these things are for their safety so they will be the ones insisting on them. I know that's sad, but sometimes kids have to learn to take up the slack when parents aren't acting responsibly.

One positive thing, these kids who learn to take care of themselves early usually grow to be much more responsible....

[Reincarnated]

I had to do that very thing with my kids riding in the front seat of his truck. When I voiced concern, he FREAKED at the insinuation that he was not a perfect parent. More justifications that they "have done it hundreds of times before," or that "it isn't illegal." No, dumbass, but there are warnings all through the car that they aren't tall enough/old enough/heavy enough. I finally just got on the kids' cases about it.

Guess what? He was in an accident on the highway with D9 in the car today (his tailgating nonsense). She was a good girl--buckled up in the back, because she ASKED to sit there.

[cat03]

thanks C2H))))))))) will pray for some wisdom to get into that thick skull of his. I think he was indeed looking for the booster seat as d5 told me that dad said she was 7, I put 2 and 2 together and the trooper did ask stbx why she wasnt' in a booster seat. Dingbat.

I try to rot, to always make the kids buckle, d5 is getting lazy because he doens't make them buckle so she's forgetting, but I'll be more firm about it.

Donna, wow!! i'm so glad nothing happened to her! what a good girl! it only takes one time.

Well, my wedding rings are missing, 50% chance he took them, 50% chance d5 took them to play with them. I was angry at first, but then I remembered I didnt' care for them much anymore, they used to mean something. I still hope I find them, at some point they where meaningful. I asked stbx ( I toned it down from "why did you take my rings? to "have you seen my rings") he swears he didnt' and surprised I didn't pawned them. After I asked if he pawned his he said that money wise they werent worth much... I couldnt' help myself, I told him the rings were 24k, and that they weren't worth much to him anyways. He got ticked off and said to stop txting him.

Funny though, as I sent the txt I felt for a big the old hurt and yuckines, and I realize how damaging those convos used to be for me, I'm so glad I'm past that (other than the ring txt) I don't bring up any A/M talk.

[ACJ]

Cat when my children we tiny I once met a woman with a baby the same age at a toddler group. I watched her put her baby in it's carry baby seat onto the front seat of the car. She didn't fasten a seat belt around it but just got into the drivers side. Thinking she had just forgotten to put the seat belt around the chair I pointed it out to her. She said she never bothered with the seat belt to secure the chair in place.

Irresponsible? Yes. Misinformed? No. This woman was a nurse in the emergency dept and her husband was a consultant also in the ER! They must see the consequences of this type of behaviour all day every day and yet................. Like your H I'm sure they thought 'it will never happen to me' I never saw this woman again and I hope and pray that her child never did end up in the ER as a result of her negligence but I'm sure it was there but for the grace of God.

[Committed2Him]

Running (sounds better to me than "ROT")
GREAT suggestion.

cat, 10y/o son could be the responsible big brother and help her. Dad will get the point. Do, do so in a way that S can do so without feeling like he is hurting his dad's feelings, otherwise he may feel conflicted.

I see my wedding ring every now and again as I have it stored with some valuables. It makes me sad but then I have to dismiss the feelings and move on.

He got ticked off and said to stop txting him.

Just reading between the lines, sharing about my experience. X and I tried to be civil but my bitterness would take her comments and blow things up and visa versa. I always sought to be calm and non confrontational which is my nature and she is explosive and maybe even a bit bipolar. Bottom line, we learned to just keep our distance. Really keep our distance and I am happier for it.

just a thought

[cat03]

yes toots, you are right, I have not said anything in the past weeks that would start "those" kind of convos, they don't bring anything good to the table.

Txed him today about Sunday, he was fine, all forgotten, kids are doing good and having time with him. Distance does help.

Not much planned this weekend, it's going to be a hot one! smooches to all)))))))

[Committed2Him]

Early on, lots of interaction with X, sort of trying to be like friends but it was too hard. Ultimately dealt with the major portion of my resentment and bitterness.

Now, I am quite content to be distant with the only communication between us is kids related. Some very brief emails, an occasional text.

Life is much simpler that way.

So, what you gonna do SPECIAL for yourself that you normally can't do when the kids are around?

[cat03]

well, so far I haven't had a week without kids for one reason or another, I normally do my volunteering, umm, well, lol, haven't done much just for fun yet!

I'd like to go to a non-kids museum, the house could use a cleaning (but that's not special, so never mind ), um, go to a girlie movie, haven't thought more than that, lol

[Committed2Him]

common, ya gotta think out of the (litter) box!

Glad you nixed the cleaning, sheesh woman, the girls are gonna have to work on you!

When I had nothing special, I would go to a serene place, listen to some music, read something just for me, journal and alway try to enjoy something beautiful from God's creation.

I've driven through canyons, done bike riding, been to the ocean tons of time (as a matter of stinkin fact, I just inspired myself to go to the pier, have NY style pizza and desert!)

Im outta here!

[Committed2Him]

(yep, went to the pier, loved my pizza, met a "free spirit" who played folk music and talked about life after death. Met two homeless guys, gave them the few bucks I had and just shared how God delivered me from alcoholism and sustained me through a divorce. THEN I got to listen to a couple of chapters of the bible in Spanish as I strolled the pier on a gorgeous night. 20 months ago I might have been deveatated about having plans with my kids fall through but last night was simply a blessing! )