Bridgestone, your words are thought-provoking. I guess I never really thought about the way men view physical intimacy - and yes, the only reason I would decine would be because I didn't want to hurt him if things don't work out. (Made perfect sense, by the way:)
Right now, we've decided that we're just taking things very slowly. We're discussing counseling, although the financial aspect of it is holding us up somewhat, but I suppose there is no price too great if it means we can salvage our marriage - if, of course, that is what we ultimately decide we want to do.
To answer your question, OM is still in my life. I've been reading a book called "When Good People Have Affairs" by Mira Kirshenbaum which has given me a lot of insight as to why things have transpired in my life. The bad thing is, I still have a lot of thinking left to do regarding H and OM. It's so hard when they're both really good men - and I know deep inside that H should have the advantage in the equation (and I suppose he truly does) - but somehow that doesn't automatically mean an easy solution to a very difficult problem. I'll just keep hanging in there, thinking until I give myself headaches, because it seems like the longer this goes on, the harder it gets.
Patience is a virtue... I just haven't learned that virtue yet
Me (WAW) 30 H (LBS) 31 T since 6/10/1994 M 8/8/98 No kids S 3/10/08 D filed 6/9/08; put on hold 7/14/08 D finalized 10/13/08
