I Think I Have Officially DB'd Guys!!!

[sage]

In this vein, my W said something to me interesting the other day...after her seminar. We were having an R talk and I told her that I thought everything in life has a purpose...even her A, but that I didn't want my view of that to make her think that her behavior was okay, 'cuz it wasn't. She made the remark to me, "I don't think it was okay. You have to forgive yourself for forgiving me." I thought about this poignent comment because it makes sense. Ethically (or rather, my ego), I cannot condone such atrocious behavior and I find myself resisting "letting go." I mean, I feel I've already forgiven her, but I still have this unsettled feeling inside me. This unsettled feeling, I think, is my conscience not wanting me to let myself forgive myself for forgiving her. I know, odd, but rang true for me.

Wow. What a tremendous insight by w!

I'm almost done with a book that somewhat addressed this topic for me (tho' nowhere near as concisely or pointedly as your w!). It's called "The Art of Forgiving" by Lewis Smedes.

Sage