Well, everyone seems to think that the bar thing is positive. I guess for me I don't feel real comfortable, as I am torn. On the one hand, I'd like to totally ignore OM (other than dirty looks) if he's there, but I also feel compelled to go "talk" to him and ask him WTF. As my W put it, "he got off easy." Well, in retrospect, maybe he didn't, 'cuz I know he was scared I was going to hunt him down. My W confirmed this on many occasions.
I want to take the "higher road," but I also want to let him know what a piece of s--t he is!
Quoting KAW:I even think that you have surpassed where I'm at and putting some distance between us.
Don't know about that, KAW. You seem far better than me at letting things go, my friend.
Quoting KAW:Many here will be envious (myself included) that your W is making a conscientious effort to work on self improvements with an eye on the benifit of strengthening the bonds of the R as well.
I know. I feel pretty fortunate in this regard...that my W has admitted to her own issues and is doing something about them... She has also been sharing more of her fears with me lately, which is also nice.
I still can't shake the feeling that I don't really know her...that everything has been an illusion for so long. Having a healthy, loving R seems distant to me...but I don't know whether I've built up some kind of perverse fantasy in my mind of what a "true" R is, or whether my expectations are realistic...
