Bring on the Rain - Part 3

[SueS]

Saffie - Thanks for everything. I remember you talking about your dad & mum. I don't want my D4 to be around that. She'll see the anger when it comes out. Last night she just about had an absolute meltdown. She was playing around telling H that I had been naughty and that I needed to be spanked. Well, H comes up behind me and puts me in a type of headlock. He was goofing around but talking in this stern, angry voice. She just started screaming and crying. He let go right away and told her that he was only playing around. She was crying really hard, but she was able to get out....I don't like it when you hurt my mommy. I held her and made sure she knew I was okay.

lwb- I went to a counselor when I was young. It was around one of the times that my dad went through treatment. She was good for me. She knew then that my dad's & in fact my grandfather's (mom's side) alcoholism had already had a great impact on me. I swore I wouldn't marry an alcoholic. I moved 12 hrs. from home to IL to be with my H. I didn't know how bad things could get. I should have packed up right then & left, but I thought things would change. I thought I could change him.

So, H's car needs some major work done. He may not get it back until next Tues. He'll have to rent a vehicle to use. I picked him up and gave him a ride to work today. On the way there, he told me about his car and how much it might cost. Could be up to $1500. He said, Well, I guess God has really decided to punish me.....a DUI, one of my worst performance months at work and now car problems. He mentioned one other thing, but I can't remember what it was. I didn't ask him WHY God was punishing him. I kept pretty quiet. I saw a spark of something in my H today that I've seen before. I picture H getting ready to run away. Run to IN, maybe? Since his brother is getting divorced he'd have someone to live with. Then, if they're both single, they could plan a move to CA. I know that he is still in contact with OW. I saw an outgoing call to her last night. Maybe I'm just overthinking things, but it just appears that he's slowly moving her out of his life. Maybe he's got me snowed....AGAIN. I've seen this before. Times when life doesn't go right for him in any area of his life. Instead of turning things around, he runs. Me letting him go, his slow performance at work, (if) things slowing down with OW....etc....are all things that would make him say...see, this is the perfect time to bolt. And yes, he would leave his D4. I know he truly loves her, but I have no doubts that he'd go.