Quote: I HAVE changed first. I've been doing that all along. Do I need to "change" again? Perhaps...but again, I'm tired, LL...I just want to "be." Maybe you'd interpret that as a lack of effort, but one can only "drive" so long.
well then Jethro, from what I've read about you and the way you "are" in the r...just "being" would be a change now wouldn't it? can you just "be" and allow w to just "be" as well? I think you'd find yourself less tired and maybe just maybe w might pick up where you've left off?
Quote: Ahh...expectations. You know as well as I, LL, that we can only give for so long without expecting something in return...and frankly, for years I have done this...
ok then, what is it you are "expecting" in return that you aren't getting in some form or another?
Quote: So, then, how do I achieve my objective without telling her my needs, as I've been doing? I don't see how I can make it any clearer.
let's define your "needs" vs. your "wants" and see if we can't all come up with some plan to go about getting them met.
Quote:
are things getting better even if slowly? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Not sure. They were for a while, but maybe it's my own problems with not "getting over it."
so things got better for a while but you are not sure if they are still getting better? are things getting any worse? if things are not getting worse and you are just concerned that you've platued can you possible look at it as, you have come a long way and are taking a rest to regroup and note the changes made already? also it is good to note that the problems of "getting over it" are OUR problems and we shouldn't hold our s's responsible for getting us over it, sure what they do and don't do can effect the healing process but ultimately it's up to us to heal.
Quote: I guess what it comes down to is I'd really like her to express to me that she wants to be with me.
again I will remind you that I do know how you feel, but let's look at the BIG picture...if she didn't want to be with you why the heck would she be there...why would she call you like she did yesterday to see how you were doing, why would she even make the slightest attempt at fixing things. If she didn't want to be with you I doubt you'd even get half of what you're getting now.
Quote: Perhaps show a little jealousy...just a little...something to give me a sign she's afraid of losing me.
she can't be afraid of loosing you if you are always so concerned with whether or not she wants to be with you. when you stop being afraid to loose her maybe she'll then show you some of that jeolousy.
