Thanks Michelle. I know I will get through this, I have done it once.

I called one of my friends today, she doesn't live here, but will be in the wedding too. I told her everything. She didn't even know about H's affair. I tried not to tell people because I didn't want it to be an issue if I forgave him. I don't think I will be forgiving him now. She really helped. It is really hard for me to tell people about this, I guess it makes me feel like a failure. I know that is not true, but still how I feel.

I told her that I felt like a fool for chosing to marry someone who could treat me this way. She said I am not a fool and there is no way I could have known. She said it could happen to anyone. I know all this, but it just helps to hear it sometimes.

I think I have about decided to go the wedding by myself. H will make it awkward, and I think it would be inappropriate to take the other guy that volunteered at this time. Not ready for the questions. I think my friends there (and here \:\)) will be able to help me through this.

Kris