Well, unfortunately, my remarks are not the best here.
Quoting LL:I think then it is up to you to be the one to change first. You recognize the patterns...instead of playing your typical same old role in the cycle why not find a new part to play...change the script..improvise and see what happens.
I HAVE changed first. I've been doing that all along. Do I need to "change" again? Perhaps...but again, I'm tired, LL...I just want to "be." Maybe you'd interpret that as a lack of effort, but one can only "drive" so long.
Quoting LL:how can we throw away our score cards and simply give without expectations.
Ahh...expectations. You know as well as I, LL, that we can only give for so long without expecting something in return...and frankly, for years I have done this...
Quoting LL:can you buy a new album? sing a different song, get an updated version, pick a new tunnel to go down?
So, then, how do I achieve my objective without telling her my needs, as I've been doing? I don't see how I can make it any clearer.
Quote: when you are "hung up" and stuck in the past what good is it doing you?
none
Quote: are things better now than they were during her a?
of course
Quote: are things getting better even if slowly?
Not sure. They were for a while, but maybe it's my own problems with not "getting over it."
Quote: what about the current r do you like?
She's more like her old self before the A. She's purposefully doing nice things for me. She's "softer" and more communicative.
Quote: what about the current r do you not like? what is missing from the current r?
I guess what it comes down to is I'd really like her to express to me that she wants to be with me. She's come around in other ways, such as knowing she has a lot to be thankful for with her current life. Thing is, I want her to want me. Perhaps show a little jealousy...just a little...something to give me a sign she's afraid of losing me. Is that somewhat pathetic? I WANT HER TO THROW ME A BONE!
