Quote: For me, it's more that I know what patterns represent what didn't work in the past and I don't want to repeat those patterns. Also, I know what it takes to draw her closer, and she knows (as I've told her a million times) what it takes to draw me closer. This is what we need to work on, and frankly, I do far more work than she...and she will admit it.
since you know that these negative patterns exist and you also are aware that she for whatever reason (let's not use the thoughts you have about why) doesn't seem aware or chooses to continue the bad patterns I think then it is up to you to be the one to change first. You recognize the patterns...instead of playing your typical same old role in the cycle why not find a new part to play...change the script..improvise and see what happens.
Quote: Honest to God, I don't know. I feel I "give" pretty consistently while she does it in more "spurts."
how can we throw away our score cards and simply give without expectations. can we notice any trends that coincide with the times that they are giving more, especially when it occurs on it's own and not after some "talk".
Quote: Perhaps you have a point. Thing is, I feel as though I become a broken record. Frankly, it's my opinion she knows what she needs to do, but chooses not to out of apathy.
can you buy a new album? sing a different song, get an updated version, pick a new tunnel to go down?
Quote: I just get hung-up when I think that she had a full-blown A for over a year...a year she also put me through hell.
when you are "hung up" and stuck in the past what good is it doing you? are things better now than they were during her a? are things getting better even if slowly? what about the current r do you like? what about the current r do you not like? what is missing from the current r?
