Guilty as charged.. I am a WAW.

[Bridgestone]

Max
I can hear your frustration with trying to get your WAW to see your perspective on the feelings/actions piece.


I guess I can understand that having the feeling of lonliness (for example) there are some actions you have the option to take to act on that feeling.

1- ignore it
2- look for a way to connect to your partner to alleviate it
3- look for someone/something else to take your mind off it, until it passes

So it seems to me (althouh I haven't read your sitch) that your wife did choose an action to 'deal with' her emotions.

You just don't like the action she chose. Which is entirely understandable.

Did she try 1 & 2 first? I don't know.
Did she try #2 often enough & not have a response that helped alleviate the lonliness that she then tried #3? I don't know.

Maybe her trying #2 often, made you feel nagged on or clung to, and you chose to act on that feeling of annoyance by ignoring her.

I don't know that either, but those are all actions that follow emotions.

As I read somewhere, life is 10% of what really happens to us and 90% of how we react to it (which does include feelings).

Peace