Thanks for the thoughts. I agree, I agree. My real goal is to support her in her quest to forge meaningful adult friendships which is one of her New Year's resolutions while at the same time not going nuts with anxiety. I overreact to these things but totally agree with you about letting her know how I feel.
Probably time to drag back into marriage counseling. It was the best thing we ever did in our marriage. 1 full year of weekly torment and we are closer than ever (usually) now.