I understand revisiting pass hurts, I think this is just human. However, doing this, I believe, hurts us more than we can imagine. It seeps into our thoughts, affects our actions, we begin to live through these times again.
You said you are dudley-do right. Is your W intimitated by this? Here she does the worse thing in a M, realizes her mistake, but has probably been scared to give you details, how can she confirm the suspicions of a man who is moral when she has been amoral. I understand where you are coming from, but I think part of DB is understanding and accepting where they are coming from. I don't mean forget about this, but accept her apologies as legit and whole-hearted and move on to the next stage of this ride.
I think a vacation is a great idea. How about at least a mental vacation? Give yourself a week or two where you will use every visiualation trick you know to stop thinking of the R, and just do whatever else you do that is not about M. Easier said than done. You seem to be on the brink of a thriving M, just letting go of the hurt seems to be a huge part of that.
