I can relate to having to focus on one thing at a time. I lost my job w/in 2 months of my D becoming final. Stay focused and most importantly keep you faith and PMA up. You have to take care of you so you can get where you need to go.
My C told me that of the roughly 50% of M's that do not end up in D - about 15% of that 50% are really great partnerships. Those really great ones take time to find. Many people settle for less. I am shooting for that 15% next time - that is what it will take for me to make changes to what TC called the rhythm I have established in my life since my D 5 years ago.
And while I am finally ready to date, I am in the middle of adopting - and that is one of my highest priorities right now. My career is also important to me. And I have four cats that I adore. Any guy that dates me will have to understand that while a P will be an important part of my life - these other parts of my life are also important to me and a part of who I am. I would like him to be accepting and supportive of those parts of my life. In fact, I would like him to also have other parts of his life where he needs time/space away from me.
My C also always tells me when I get worked up that I don't have to decide the rest of my life today. Take one step at a time. If this guy is meant to be - he will eventually get that the R is a partnership. If he doesn't get that - do you really want to spend a lifetime validating his need for you. If he is doing this now - it will get worse with time.
My GF has a H that calls her all the time - when he is away on business trips, when she goes out with her friends, when she is out with the kids. He has no one else - no other support system and is very dependent on her for his sense of well being. We went out to lunch once and much to my surprise - he decided to join us on a girl's lunch. If she doesn't answer her cell when he calls - he calls over and over again and leaves a million messages.
The X and I had similar issues. I didn't have any space in that R. At first I thought it was love and so flattering - then over time I felt claustrophobic. He jever ever wanted to go anywhere w/o me and if he ever went anywhere - he would call me continously. I was showered with flowers and cards and well every romantic thing you can think off - but it was all the time and too much.
I am not saying break up with your guy. Just proceed with caution and don't ignore your instincts. I am also a big proponent of the two year rule that TC posted about. A GF told me about that one - and that is one I am not budging on. I am slow - I need time to get to know someone before I will even consider moving in or sharing my life with him.
Please keep us posted on your job hunt. I hope something comes through for you soon - being in financial limboland is miserable. Just remember if you are getting a million rejections it doesn't matter - you just need ONE offer.
Any guy that dates me will have to understand that while a P will be an important part of my life - these other parts of my life are also important to me and a part of who I am. I would like him to be accepting and supportive of those parts of my life. In fact, I would like him to also have other parts of his life where he needs time/space away from me.