Boy did that fit! I never did go back and look at that website after I bookmarked it.
May have to look mine up. See if it says anything encouraging!
BTW I think the idea you came up with of expressing your appreciation is a great one! I am thinking that my H's LL is Words of Affirmation. Reading the book now but without reading that is my guess!
Hope you have a great day and get lots of new plans in place.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
After reading your horiscope decided to check out mine. I don't quite know what to make of it. If you get a chance drop by my thread and see if you have any thoughts on it. And WOW check out my H's! And he was sitting right behind me as we read it together.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Get working on your resolutions to change your actions!!
I did bookmark the Horoscope website and having been reading it daily. It sure fits me alot as well most days.
Thinking of you in class today. I think my situation just got tougher for the weekend. H sent a email at work about selling the Vette. Unless I have huge objections. He has a sincere interested buyer and since I haven't driven it in 2mos I should sell. Why didn't H say something to me at home last night or this morning? The email was sent at 7:30am this morning. Just when I was getting ready to take action. I'm hoping to avoid a controversy on this issue. Send me positive vibes.
Quoting sage: Fer crying out loud...here's my horoscope for today.
There’s a sense of deja-vu. If you haven’t been exactly here before, you have been somewhere similar or you have always, inwardly known that one day you would arrive at a point like this. You are right to detect something significant about the situation, but wrong to fear that it is a replay of some previous scenario, predestined to have a particular outcome. Now, you can do something different and get a result that causes the rule book to be re-written. You are not stuck in a rut, you are standing on a launch-pad and you are about to take off towards a very exciting destination.
Hi Sage, It's me again. I still haven't started a thread under my name. However, I wanted to post you a message. I read my Horoscope. It told me to "You can't get it right unless your brave enough to risk getting it wrong. You must rediscover the desire to be adventurous. ..... Yet the opportunity before you now is one which deserves to be bravely seized. This weekend's new moon represents one occasion when impulsivenless and courage work firmly in your favour."
Well, I did get brave on the car.
H wrote at 7:45am: "I have folks that have a sincere interest in buying the corvette. Unless there are huge objections, I thik it's time to sell as it hasn't been driven in 2 months. Are you keeping it or do I continue to make loan and insurance payments on a car that isn't driven?"
I reponded at 2:14pm: "You have made a valid and solid point for selling the corvette. I'm not ready to sell at this time. However, I will re-evaluate this decision if the car does not get driven in the future."
I hope that I was polite without being defensive. I also wanted to acknowledge the valid issue. I was afraid to give reasons because of sounding defensive.
Sage, I'm onto chapter 3 of DR. I've started my list. When I start my thread, I will post my obstacles for a beginners mind. And some goals that I want.
Have a good weekend. I will send you and e-mail Monday. Remember the positives each day with your H. And remember to voice positive reinforcement to your H on things he does well. Topaz. I Believe in Forever
There is always some good thought-provoking stuff over here.
I've been thinking tons on this reassurance things, as I'm so stuck in that mode. But before bomb, did you seek it in the same manner as you do now, or was it just assumed?
What I'm thinking is are we asking for something that is so different from what we ever wanted/needed/demanded before that it is not in their genetic make-up to do this and what we want is a fictional hollywood leading man?
I like the positive reinforcement, that idea has been popping up on my thread, and I think I'm going to go at it full force and see what happens.
well, I'm home from class. have a few pages of a paper to write and then I'm free!
I took a bold leap and wrote an email to h. well, wrote then rewrote then threw away then wrote again. Hey, I even mailed it!
It essentially apologized for last night, clarified two points that I think he misunderstood (one about ow, one about the "timing" of my discussions) and then essentially said: look, we've both been working our asses off on this m. I'm still stuck over something. I don't understand how we can heal completely unless we get upfront about how to fortify our m. so that this doesn't happen again. I know that I have done some terrible things to you that must have left you feeling lost and alone. I have cried over my behavior. I'm not looking to rehash the affair details. I'm looking to understand what we can do to make sure this never happenss again to either one of us. Can you see your way clear to discussing difficult topics with me? we could do it via email if that helps. I'll start...
then I listed 10 things he's been doing that make me feel loved. And 1 thing that he's been doing that I've been struggling with. I "owned" the struggle, I told him that I knew that I couldn't control his behavior but that if he were willing, I had a suggestion on a compromise that may work for both of us.
sent it. instantly wished that I could take it back.
Got home expecting him to be out with his pals. He wasn't. I asked him for a kiss. Got one in a funny manner. No mention of email but I know he got it. Before he headed out the door he ask for a hug and then yelled out "i love you".
Now I can't WAIT to get my DB'ing hat around my "crap". I dabbled a bit in asking for what I wanted. Feels like a step forward.
I'll start a new thread soon....with my actions, my DB goals, etc. May be tonight if I can stand the unbelievable heat in the office!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
