NTE - Well it would appear you are headed for the basement. I don't think that is a good move. I understand your reasoning, but it is faulty. That isn't meant to be a dig on you, its just that nearly all people in your position, with years of animosity between you, cannot see logical reasoning in your situation. That is why it is faulty. You are both too close to the sitch to gain any true perspective.
But keep venting, journaling, letting us know what's up, even if it gets worse. We're here for ya...I know you have said it before that counseling is out of the question because (in your words) your wife won't agree to it, but as a few of us here have been saying, it seems to be your only hope of getting an outside objective opinion and some new ideas to try.
I know you don't really want to try anymore though, and that is a big problem of course.
