Hey ISLH. Thought you dropped off. Hope all is well. Time for you to update us (maybe you have and I missed your thread?)
On vacation with the kids. Having fun. The cabin has internet and a pool table but is it kind of small. But the bedrooms are on separate floors so the kids and I have space.
The weather is great and the attractions are great. Kids are going on and on about everything. They are having fun.
More people here than normal. Lots of traffic and line waiting. But that is okay.
However, I don't like the vacation for the same reasons as last year - only worse this year.
This is a *family* vacation and we are not a complete family. I see too many "happy" couples with their kids. Laughing and sharing and teaching their kids what life is about.
I am a single dad and it sucks.
My daughter has mentioned several times now how she misses mom not being with us.
The kids call Ex last night - they were so excited about the trip and wanted to share with mom. At the end of their call S10 gave me the phone and said "mom wants to talk to you" in an excited way. I say hi and Ex tries to make small talk and then says that "the kids sure wanted us to talk" and then "did you ask to speak to me?".
Sure the kids wanted us to talk. They spent all day seeing family after family - moms and dads together. DUHHH. Ex has not a clue what this has done to our kids.
Not a clue.
I told her "no, I did not ask to speak with you" - end of phone call.
I don't want her in my life except as a co-parent. I refuse her as a *friend" in any sense of that word.
It is difficult to show her respect when I am with the kids when in fact I have little respect for her.
But I will not let this hurt the kids any more than possible. And they have been hurt - even if Ex chooses to turn a blind eye to reality.
Jeff, it's more than time that you make YOUR life YOUR memories with the kids. Quit tormenting yourself going back to the places where you were a family.
Create your own life. Create your own happiness. Step out of your box. Get over being bitter about the past, it will only give xw more reason to say 'see! I was right!' Ok, I'll even say it - GAL! but make it your own.
Oh, and send pics or I'll make you come and work on my fences.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Sure the kids wanted us to talk. They spent all day seeing family after family - moms and dads together. DUHHH. Ex has not a clue what this has done to our kids.
Not a clue.
I told her "no, I did not ask to speak with you" - end of phone call.
I don't want her in my life except as a co-parent. I refuse her as a *friend" in any sense of that word.
It is difficult to show her respect when I am with the kids when in fact I have little respect for her.
Jeff,
I agree.... I think you should have as little contact with her as possible...... IMHO, contact OUTSIDE the realm of co-parenting is unecessary....
Quote:
"The past is never there when you try to go back. It exists, but only in memory. To pretend otherwise is to invite a mess." - Chris Cobbs
Take Care,
NMD
"Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last --more than passion or even sex!" - Simone Signoret
Since I am in a philosophical mood, I will leave you a quote from one of my favorite historical figures...
Quote:
"The present is never our goal: the past and present are our means: the future alone is our goal. Thus, we never live but we hope to live; and always hoping to be happy, it is inevitable that we will never be so." - Blaise Pascal
Take Care,
NMD
"Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last --more than passion or even sex!" - Simone Signoret
WCW - would not matter the spot - all these vacation spots are designed around the "happy" family, not the single parent. That is what sucks, not the fact that Ex and I came here before (we never came with the kids so the kids do feel that this is "our" place - the kids and mine - Ex has never taken the kids here).
But you are correct about losing the anger.
Spent the day at Dollywood. Spent is the key word - we are dog tired. Plus we go back tomorrow (two day pass). Got to do alot and got on some good rides. Got wet (lot of water related rides here). Fun.
Had several couples ask if I would take their picture for them. I must be someone they trust with their camera
Cute couples all. Felt like giving them the URL of this BB - most likely they will need it
Tight tops and shorts seem to be 'in' on women this summer. Some hot women out there but most don't take care of themselves. Neither do the guys.
And tight tops and shorts on the teens - well I would not let my daughter dress like what I have seen. But she is only S7, not S15 so I don't know. But girls did not dress that way when I was younger - or at least I did not notice.
So, life goes on. Kids ARE having fun and memories ARE being built.
That rocks.
And although I could use some adult interaction (other than with the people on the waiting lines), I do get to call the shots for me and the kids without 'her' interference.
Glad you are having fun. Look on the bright side of this. If she was there, you probably would be making concessions so that she doesn't have to do stuff she doesn't want to (like stay at the amusement park too long) and you could just as easily be fighting with her as making good memories. These kind of vacations are fraught with opportunities to fight.
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with. Dr. Wayne Dyer