H had 3 year affair and I never knew!

[BeingMe]

HC, I doubt your H loved any of the OW ... he never left you for any of them, did he? And, why, if he had checked out so long ago, did he have children with you? I think your H is a selfish, serial cheater, and couldn't care less about you, his family, or the OW in his life. It's all about him, and his wants.

You are entitled to feel angry, betrayed, etc. Just don't let it take you over. I also don't think it a good idea to discuss his having sex with other people, and I see no good purpose in discussing his OW. Maybe, you should aim for a friendly co-parenting R, but not being friends. Just polite, and distant.

Of course, this is just my opinion. Take care.