Do you think I should confront my w about this OM that I'm pretty sure is giving her emotional support.
Any advice here?
Hon...how is her relationship with this man any different than your relationship with the woman who is your friend that you described earlier? Aren't they serving the same function?
And...well, you have no power right now. The more you push and point fingers, the more she'll cling to someone else.
My H was in an EA with another woman, all the while saying they were "just friends" (despite the letters I found he wrote her, never sent her...and I think it was mostly one sided--she was being a support). Over time, I found myself with a male friend, developed feelings for him in that same way--he was in a similar sitch with a GF. I know at least a part of it was out of spite.
Anyway...unless you are willing to cut all ties with your friend--and do it FIRST, and do it WITHOUT COMMENT, then I think you really have no right to be upset with your W. You didn't respect her feelings about this other W in your life, so why should she respect yours?
Ultimately in a M, any "friend" that is a threat to the M must be set to the side. Unfortunately, you are in no position to be making any demands at all.
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
