I'm 3 mths post mess, and by God's grace I'm doing well, of course it will take me/you quite a few months to reshuffle our cards and remake our paths, but we can have a much better life than before.
A great book that helps me get the neg. thoughts out of my head and helps me concentrate in constructive thinking is "Healed without scars". Your thoughts will make you or break you, it is overwhelming, all the stuff we can brood about, what was or could've been. Its hard, but we can retrain our minds to point towards more positive thoughts. Yes, our children need us and we deserve to be whole and happy. When the urge comes when you want to bawl, call a friend, it has always helped me, to have someone on the other line to just listen, and afterwards I felt much MUCH better (and the urges to cry hard have been diminishing month after month, it's been a while since I've had a good cry).
You are in good company, my prayers for you today))))
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
