Get some legal advice, NOW, before your wife's gambling problem bankrupts you. You need to protect yourself legally against her financial problems. This is escalating out of control.
Just as you expected your W to take better care of you during your manic episodes, you may need to see this as you taking care of her during her gambling addiction. One important way to take care of her is to NOT BE ENABLING! If she can't afford to live separated but is gambling away hundreds of dollars a month - she's in trouble.
Talk to an attorney before you move out of the house - even though it was given to her, you may have some claim to part of it, depending on the circumstances, and moving out may hurt that claim. If there's no legal repercussions, then find a way to move out - you being there in her face is a form of pursuing, she does need space.
BUT - when you move out, you only give her what money she would normally be entitled to in a divorce - nothing more. She needs the reality check of what it will cost to live as a divorced mother of two, and needs to discover that her gambling habit cannot continue.
Cancel any joint credit cards, btw. She could bankrupt you in no time if you're not careful. Get legal advice on this pronto.
Validate that it was awful for her to live through your manic episodes. She may simply not be strong enough to bear any more pain - who knows. Right now she's messed up and suffering from her own mental problems.
And don't you dare move away from your kids. She was right on that one. They need you in their life, they do NOT need you to be living in another state. Fight for a fair share of visitation.
