H had 3 year affair and I never knew!

[happycamper]

Ok, so he's home after 2 days and nights away. He's caring, kind, friendly, but talking about viewing flats (I am encouraging him to be honest now). We were also talking about possible sexual encounters for him now, he says he is kind of on the lookout.

Don't get me wrong, I think for us it is much better for him to tell me. Firstly, it helps me to see where we really are, and secondly this is our new R (as co-parents) which doesn't have the secrecy. I don't want to have a R with him where we go back to the lying and the awkwardness. I would much rather he told me about sleeping with other people than not.

But goodness, already? When did this man leave me exactly (mentally I mean)? I was literally so shocked I had to sit down and have a cup of tea, I was lightheaded.

The irony is, that finally I have got the openess I wanted with him, and it makes him so much nicer. I like spending time with him. Yet it is over. I almost can't understand why he has got to move out, why we can't spend the weekends together.